GROUP MIND

Many of us are busy, busy people with jobs, friends, family, chores, etc. I, personally, have a great immediate circle of friends with whom I socialize on a regular basis. Most of these friends I’ve met through my theatre world, and then there are the friends who I’ve met through those friends in the theatre world, but are not necessarily “theatre” people. People hang out with those that they share common interests with. My social world is very full and as it is, I don’t see many of my friends as much as I’d like to.

I don’t do much socializing at work because, frankly, most of the people here I don’t have much in common with, except working here. Anyone who knows me well, knows that I abhor forced group activity. I shunned any dorm activity my freshman year of college in favor of seeking out friends in a more organic matter. I failed to see how a jaunt to Dairy Queen for a study break (they made posters for this) would really bring people together. It can show who really likes ice cream or who has goals to be an R.A. or who cannot come up with their own things to do on a Thursday night.

I spent a lot of college “trolling” different groups. Pre-declared theatre major I would go out with a different group every night. Saturday it was the Rugby people and this awesome chick (later roommate) from my dorm, Sunday it was the stoners in Stevens Whitney, Monday it was the jocks in Stevens Whitney, Tuesday I geeked it up with library pals, Wednesday was the extreme sports, stoner dudes in Student Village (or Stud Ville), Thursday was the tennis player from my poetry class (whom I’m pretty sure was gay), Friday was the highlarious, dorky dudes with jock tendencies in Hitchcock. Then the next week I would hang with the radio dj’s or this weird little indie rock kid, or the folks from the dining hall, or the rock bands. It went on and on. I suppose I was finding myself and having one hell of a time. Once I did finally declare theatre and got super busy with plays and things, I was able to recruit so many people to come to the theatre, many of whom had never been. I felt like a little diplomat and I was proud to have been called the Mayor of Central Washington University.

I have deep, deep seeded issues, as many of us do, stemming from being shunned from groups. I would be repeatedly shunned as I kept failing to grasp the group rules. I talked to anyone and everyone. I learned that that was frowned upon in school. I dressed how I wanted and had a good time with clothes. Again, not the thing to do. I said eff the group long ago because any group (popular, choir geeks, drama nerds, regular nerds, etc) has their unwritten rules, which I could never abide by fully. Plus, if you accept to define yourself by a groups standards, people will judge you by those standards as well as the people within your group. It’s not just, but it does happen. Not everyone has an open mind. I cannot think of anything worse than someone thinking they know who you are based on who you happen to be with. Life’s just more colorful if you have friends scattered about many groups, you always had someone different to talk to and to learn from and very importantly, to come see your plays. (I’m really hoping that nobody is thinking of a United Colors of Benneton-sp? ad right now.)

I’d intended on addressing this lunch I had yesterday and this came out. The lunch incident will get mentioned in a future post. I gots to go study for my driving test!