Style Minus Substance (And the Style Sucks Too)

The fox network is what I like to call an enigma. It is home of some of the best and some of the worst television on the planet. I like to think of Fox as the Heidi Fleiss of networks; flashy, savvy, money hungry, cunning, edgy and turbo speed, but is so focused on instant gratification that she becomes unable to experience much deep thought or make anytime for soul searching contemplation. How is Fox so savvy? Well, they have deliberately chosen to not fully commit to anyone market or demographic. They are absolute geniuses in tapping into the many subcultures of Americans. It seems as if they have this whole other level to market research outside age group and sex. And I think it involves brain cells.

What I like about Fox is, they can be very innovative, cleaver and quite dark. (See; 24, Arrested Development, Prison Break and surprisingly the O.C.) What I don’t like is that they can be a little too into instant gratification. What I mean is that they tend to spit some shows out so fast with all the necessary bells and whistles to cause a raucous and gain some attention, and perhaps they have a really unique gimmick or “gig” as I like to say, but yet they are so careless that they, at times overlook what is the most important, IMPORTANT, element of any good TV. show, movie, play, etc., the writing.

I know this is not anything new; I was just given a reminder of this last Thursday while watching the pilot of Reunion. I was drawn to the show because I thought concept was really cool. It goes back and forth from present day to the past, beginning with 1986 for the pilot. I’m assuming that each episode will be a new year examined in the life of this group of friends, the overall objective being to solve this crazy mystery.

I pretty much assumed that Fox would make the most of the 80’s time period by throwing out all the cheesy ass pop culture references they could. They did just that. However, they did it very, very sloppily and with no more thought than an elementary school music teacher directing a 3rd grade production of Grease. The music people did better than the wardrobe people in that they did an okay job compiling a soundtrack of songs actually from 1986. Then they’d have an occasional slip like playing Total Eclipse of the Heart, which came out in 1983. It wouldn’t have been a big deal if they consistently played songs from the 80’s, but up until that point and after that it was all songs from 1985 and 1986. Yeah, that was 7th grade and I’d like to forget it, but…These sins, I can forgive.

What I cannot possibly forgive is the contribution made (or not made) by the wardrobe, hair and make up teams. As I’m not a part of the Fox network, I cannot say who to blame these decisions on, probably some sleazy fat ass producer, but whoever they are, they suck for their lack of thought, consistency and follow through. A big part of 80’s pop culture was fashion, but it was also hair. Hair was a big deal in the 80’s. Aqua Net flowed through halls between classes. My head was so stiff with gel and mousse that it didn’t move. Teasing, ratting, banana clips, Bananarama, guys using gel and blow dryers. Pants were tight and shirts were big for girls. That brooch on the collar thing was huge. Chuck Taylor’s made resurgence. Paisley made an appearance. Big, big earrings and bright, bright color, big sweaters, long pearls, and Pretty in Pink. I’m sorry Reunion, but the Madonna Material Girl/Borderline BS was loooooong gone, unless you lived in a small town. Shoulder pads were starting to be velcro’d into everything.

And lets talk make up. Oh, my God. Brights all over the place. Colored mascara, bright pink lipstick (Wet N Wild #116, the stickiest crap ever). I’m going to quote a description of Christina Aguilera that I heard last night, “…you look like if I touched you, you’d be sticky.” That is 1986 hair and make up. I didn’t see any of this on this show last Thursday. I saw a bunch of pretty people playing dress up in some 80’s-ish fashions.

My dad has always said, “What is the point of doing anything if you don’t do it right?”Precisely, Dad. Had Fox bothered to commit to the actually period that they were filming in, they’d have an easier time transitioning the twenty year time jump. (As my dear husband said, “No, I’m sorry, but it’s NOT POSSIBLE for an actor to play 18 and 38.” Good old Fox had one idea to help us buy the time jump: Take the mousy, nice girl from 1986 and make her a heavy make up wearing smoker to indicate her age.

I was so long winded about the style I haven’t touched the writing. It’s so bad. Husband pointed out that perhaps since the pilot, they’ve got new writers. Perhaps he’s right, most elementary school kids are back in session now and don’t really have the time for writing a series anymore. Ha ha ha. I hope for the actors’ sake (especially the marvelous Matthew St. Patrick from Six Feet Under) that they do. I believe it highly unjust for Fox to employ the some of the most talented writers in the business for some shows and some of the worst for others. It’s not fair to the loyal viewers, and the actors (as they look really bad sometimes) to simply rely on a cool gig and let the substance fly by the wayside. You may let Heidi Fleiss throw your engagement party, but you wouldn’t let your write your wedding vows. (This is my second silly analogy of the day. See, http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog&pop=1 for the other one.